Dluxe's World

Sunday, March 5

Urbanization and me...

Our church's bi-annual Missions Conference concluded today. This year, the focus was on urban missions and we welcomed speakers from Campus Crusade's operations in New York - Larry and Deb Christensen.

It's amazing to think of the scale of ministry that is possible only in an urban context. As was noted several times today, the combination of diversity of backgrounds and concentrated numbers makes the cities of the world a unique and 'strategic' mission field. It's always interesting to take a step outside of your own little paradigm and consider a lifestyle that is different.

What was really interesting (if that's the right word) to me was how neatly this Missions Conference wrapped up a fascinating week for me. For some reason, this entire week has echoed a singular theme...

For some time now, I've been wrestling with this whole idea of my 'calling'. For some reason, it seemed that every conversation with people who really know me centered on this idea of breaking out and doing something for Christ. Friends asking, unsolicited, how I was doing discovering God's plan for me relative to ministry. Every sermon I heard (live and via ye olde iPod) seemed to be pounding on the idea of waking up to and embracing God's call. At one point, I almost thought Alistair Begg was going to jump into my headphones and yell something like, "Brian Dellinger would ya please wake up!".

Though that would sound wicked cool in his Scottish brogue...

Telling me "Wake up, you're missing something" is not really much of a revelation. I've felt that way for a while. What would've been helpful would be if someone could actually tell me what to do once I wake up. At least give me some clear advice on what cereal to have for breakfast.

I don't know that this has much of a point as a blog entry. Then again, I'm pretty certain no other post has had one... Why start now? If pressed, I guess the point would be to ask for prayers. Pray that somehow I'd get a clearer picture of who/what God is trying to tell me to be.

As I mentioned to one of the NYC team's young ladies this morning, I'm actually very easy to please. If I felt clearly called to the mission field in Tuva, I'd pack up tomorrow. If I felt led to another church or role, I'd go gladly. If God's purpose was simply that we stay put, I certainly wouldn't argue. Instead, I just have this vague sense of being 'out of step' somehow.

So, if you're out there: Pray for some clarity in my mind... Pray that when that comes, Eva and I would be on the same page with each other. Though a Damascus Road experience would fit the bill nicely, I'm happy with something sure yet less flashy.

Then again, I guess you should be careful what you ask for, eh?

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